I write this topic reluctantly as many of my friends are therapists and I know them personally. They are extremely devoted to their clients. They care about people as a whole and truly try to keep all parties together – warmly and lovingly. Yet, the reality is that many alienated parents are howling that they were alienated from their children because of a connection to a therapist.
Here’s my guess – and it’s purely whimsical. A client-therapist connection is intense. The therapeutic atmosphere in itself – of being heard emphatically for hours – can create a synonymous bond with the listener – the therapist. Therefore, although the therapist is well-meaning a child may transfer his or her allegiance to the therapist. This is simply because the therapist is patiently giving them the time of day non-judgmentally.
The question then becomes are we stuck in a catch 22? Some children love to speak to therapists and others truly need it. How do we keep the client-therapist relationship from impinging on the loving parent-child relationship?
I’d love to hear your thoughts.